Young men giving up on marriage: ‘Women aren’t women anymore’ | News | LifeSite
January 10, 2013 (LifeSiteNews.com)
– Fewer young men in the US want to get married than ever, while the
desire for marriage is rising among young women, according to the Pew
Pew recently found that the number of women 18-34 saying that having a
successful marriage is one of the most important things rose from 28
percent to 37 percent since 1997. The number of young adult men saying
the same thing dropped from 35 percent to 29 percent in the same time.
Pew’s findings have caught the attention of one US writer who
maintains that feminism, deeply entrenched in every segment of the
culture, has created an environment in which young men find it more
beneficial to simply opt out of couple-dom entirely.
Suzanne Venker’s article, “The War on Men,”
which appeared on the website of Fox News in late November, has become a
lodestone for feminist writers who have attacked her position that the
institution of marriage is threatened, not enhanced, by the supposed
gains of the feminist movement over the last 50 years.
“Where have all the good (meaning marriageable) men gone?” is a
question much talked about lately in the secular media, Venker says, but
her answer, backed up by statistics, is not to the liking of mainstream
commentators influenced by feminism.
She points out that for the first time in US history, the number of
women in the workforce has surpassed the number of men, while more women
than men are acquiring university degrees.
“The problem? This new phenomenon has changed the dance between men
and women,” Venker wrote. With feminism pushing them out of their
traditional role of breadwinner, protector and provider – and divorce
laws increasingly creating a dangerously precarious financial prospect
for the men cut loose from marriage – men are simply no longer finding
any benefit in it.
As a writer and researcher into the trends of marriage and
relationships, Venker said, she has “accidentally stumbled upon a
subculture” of men who say “in no uncertain terms, that they’re never
“When I ask them why, the answer is always the same: women aren’t
women anymore.” Feminism, which teaches women to think of men as the
enemy, has made women “angry” and “defensive, though often
“Now the men have nowhere to go. It is precisely this dynamic – women
good/men bad – that has destroyed the relationship between the sexes.
Yet somehow, men are still to blame when love goes awry.”
“Men are tired,” Venker wrote. “Tired of being told there’s something
fundamentally wrong with them. Tired of being told that if women aren’t
happy, it’s men’s fault.”
Feminism and the sexual revolution have simply made marriage
“obsolete” for women as a social and economic refuge, but this is a
situation that should not be celebrated by feminists, Venker says.
“It’s the women who lose. Not only are they saddled with the
consequences of sex, by dismissing male nature they’re forever seeking a
balanced life. The fact is, women need men’s linear career goals – they
need men to pick up the slack at the office – in order to live the
balanced life they seek.”
A cross section of research data from the Pew Research Center for the
last months of 2012 shows the alarming trends for marriage and
child-bearing in the US. One report
published in mid-December said that the latest census data showed
“barely half” of all adults in the United States are currently married, a
“record low”. Since 1960, the number of married adults has decreased
from 72 percent to 51 today and the number of new marriages in the U.S.
declined by five percent between 2009 and 2010.
Moreover, the median age at first marriage continues to rise with
women getting married the first time at 26.5 years and men at 28.7. The
declines in marriage are “most dramatic” among young adults. Just 20
percent of those aged 18 to 29 are married, compared with 59 percent in